Friday, November 13, 2009

Wine and whining

Oh my dear and fluffy lord. Are you kidding me?

So, I'm going on a cruise, which is great. However, getting to the cruise involves a lot of flying, which I am not a huge fan of. This particular flight is a red eye. Last time I did a red eye, I slept for 6 hours AFTER I got off the plane. This trip, I don't have the luxury; I have to sleep on the flight.

I got to the airport early. Not like super early or anything. This is the SLC airport. If you get here more than an hour early, you are asking for mind numbing boredom, and you deserve everything you get from irritated homeland security. So, it's an hour before my flight. When I get to the gate, I realize it is an hour and a half before my flight. Ok. Fine.

All I really want is a glass or two of wine. I could sit back, relax, listen to my college lectures on Augustine. But no restaurants are open. OK, it is 11:30, but in an airport? Isn't airport on its own weird time, just like it has its own twisted sense of a fair price? There has got to be a restaurant open; maybe not in MY concourse, but in A concourse. So I go into the News & Books store where there are two women (why you need two employees there is beyond me). And I ask to the women whose question is "are you ready to pay?" No, I'm not ready to pay. You can plainly see I hold nothing in my hands.... whatever. I ask, "Is there anywhere in the airport that I can get a glass of wine?"

The answer: No. Not anywhere in the airport after 9.

AFTER NINE??? What, after that it's bed time? I mean, I can see having a cut off, theoretically, but NINE????

So, I'm irrationally upset about the whole thing. I have to think that in major metropolitain areas elsewhere, a grown ass woman can get a glass of wine in an airport without regard to time. I have got to believe that there are laws not dictated by the moral majority. I have to believe that the church is slowly losing control of the government in Utah. Because if I don't believe all that, it makes me feel like I am back in the church, my actions being monitored by Big Brother, whether I like it or not.

Free internet doesn't even make up for it.